


Voices in Our Heads

by jazaa



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Drabble, Gen, Pre-Captain America: The Winter Soldier
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-09
Updated: 2014-10-09
Packaged: 2018-02-20 13:11:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 585
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2430062
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jazaa/pseuds/jazaa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The thing about Avengers was that none of them was really a shining example of mental health. They all heard disembodied voices – each had their own personal invisible companion.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Voices in Our Heads

The thing about Avengers was that none on them was really a shining example of mental health. They all heard disembodied voices – each had their own personal invisible companion.

Tony was the obvious one – he had Jarvis. And his invisible friend was deemed socially acceptable, if a bit weird. Where he stood on the sliding scale of machine versus a being with a soul was debatable to everyone who encountered him. Except for Tony. He saw the whole journey Jarvis made from one end of the scale to the other.

Bruce was a bit more controversial – most people didn't know he could communicate with the Hulk. It’s not like he really ever wanted to, but it’s hard to ignore someone who screams inside your head. And once in a while, Bruce mentally screamed back at him. If the Hulk was a bit less violent the next time he was released and if Bruce’s anger was more manageable, well, no one had to know the real reason or that.

Thor was a complicated case – once in a while he heard his brother. Sometimes it was Loki from his childhood (no matter if he was full of life, timid or annoyed, he still loved his big brother) and sometimes it was Loki from now (full of triumph, arrogant or annoyed, but he still wanted to torment his not-brother). Thor hasn't told anyone about this, because they would ask the one question he doesn't know the answer to – is it just his own mental issue or is Loki the one doing this.

Steve was the saddest of them all – he heard his dead friend/brother/everything Bucky. He heard him when he was browsing the Internet (‘I think it really does have everything! Can you use it to find the rest of Commandos?’), when he was going shopping (‘Look at all those chips. We only had one flavour – misery – and we ate them and we liked it!’), even when he was eating dinner with the other Avengers (‘Y’know, I'm really glad you found a family here, punk. At least I'm not the only one worrying about you anymore.’). Steve was sure it wasn't healthy to hear your dead friend talking to you, but he wasn't going to tell anyone. Some nights Bucky's quiet stories and rants were the only way he could ever fall asleep.

For Clint it is not a single voice – it’s a multitude of them, sorted by locations and memories. There was house (mother, father, Barney – all screaming or ignoring or quietly talking), orphanage (Barney and faceless boys – all rowdy and trying to prove themselves), circus (Trickshot, Swordsman and Barney – almost family and training, and betrayal), SHIELD (Coulson, Fury and Natasha – real family and absolute trust in his abilities) and Loki (empty, free, like a bird soaring through the skies, and then crashing down into reality and shame). He heard these voices as clustered and jumbled up flashbacks, confusing and mostly nonsensical.

Natasha heard her trainers. And not just sometimes, they were a constant stream of survival rules during every moment of her life. ‘Hold your breath while you shoot’ and ‘Look at his eyes, he’s obviously lying’ and ‘Hold your fork in your right hand, it’s a better weapon than that dull knife’. For her this was as natural as breathing.

And sometimes, while they were all eating dinner together, no one noticed that the only sound was Tony snarking with Jarvis, because it was background noise to their own mute conversations and memories.


End file.
